Life is good... again..

Well, the past 24 hours of frantic and anxious moments is finally over. I am glad things turned out fine. Upon arrival to Sunway Medical Center, she was immediately  brought into the delivery suite, and I broke the first rule in delivery room....

A clear sign that says photography, video recording, and handphone aren't allowed.  What am i doing? Taking a photo of sign telling us not to take photo? Ehh?? Probably due to the fact that government policy targets 0% mortality rate in childbearing period and during child birth, since it being considered a natural process, hence shouldn't be any form of complications. And since IF in case of death in the process of child birth, it would be a huge issue and a thorough investigation would be conducted by the people from the Ministry of Health. So, my rationale is.. in case any complication arises, the do not want it to be recorded in  video or photograph. I assume they just enforced such rule as I took photos during birth of Isabelle and Natalie. 

Anyway, while in Apollo Hospital TTDI, my wife was given Ventolin tablet, a beta agonist group of drug that is prescribed to asthmatic, as it relaxes the uterus, and to prevent contraction. CTG was done and it showed one intense contraction followed by few weaker contractions. She was then admitted for observation. In case if the contraction continues, she would probably be infused with Ventolin solution and steroid injection to hasten the baby's lung maturity. 

It's funny how time seem to pass by slower when you are facing anxiety. I sat next to my wife as awaiting admission, reassuring her things would be ok. This little fella has been really active compared to Isabelle and Natalie. Now, want to come into the world before  due!???

 We booked a single room for more privacy. Not bad after all. Notice a flat screen plasma TV mounted on the wall? Well, if you're tired of watching TV, there is always the view overlooking .............. the car park. :(

Well, we chose the single bedded room mainly  of convenience for family member to accompany  my wife. That would be me...naturally.

Unfortunately, the only thing available in the room (besides the patient's bed, duhh!!) is this!

Well, fortunately, the hospital allows an additional bed for extra RM20 per night! Good,eh?

 

Time was already 6.40pm by the time we settled in. 

Well, considering, the well equipped room, with a little touch of luxury, we are happy with the service provided by the our obstetrician and the staff nurses. However, i am sure everyone who has been hospitalized before would agree that hospital food isn't very appealing, gastronomically speaking. 

      Fortunately, there is a Starbucks cafe and a convenient store on the ground floor. 

I stayed there till about 8.30pm before leaving for home to pack my stuff. Thought the jam would be over by then, but i was wrong! It took me an hour to travel from the hospital to Uptown Damansara. Reached home at 9.45pm after deposited checks into several banks.
Had a quick dinner and a shower. Natalie was looking frantically for mummy, while Isabelle understood that her mum is hospitalized because "titi"(little brother in chinese) wants to come out. I felt really touched when she told me not to worry and that she will look after "mei mei" (little sister)
We got my wife Jalan Ipoh's Siew Pao, since she craved for it. By the time i reached the hospital, it was already past 11pm.

They were conducting another CTG on her.

Unremarkable. In medical terms, when a doctor describes the result of any form of test,(ECG,EEG,Blood Investigations,CT scan,etc) as unremarkable, it means no abnormality. Which is good. Not "unremarkable" means not good..
 After seeing the result myself which showed no more contraction, I was glad and relieved.
Thanks to my dearest wife who arranged for an extra bed for me, instead of sleeping on the chair. 

  That night I while watching some show in Star Movie channel, i turned and looked at my wife. She looked so serene and calm. Its a soothing feeling to watch her sleep so well. 

Woke up around 8am in the morning. It felt great after knowing that nothing "unwanted" happened, and she was deemed well to go home by the obstetrician, the same view that i saw outside the room yesterday seem different today. Sky is more bluish, trees look greener, moving to and fro with the blow of the wind, as if its waving a "hi" to me. Life is good.... that should be my philosophy.           

  We had our brunch at Starbucks at the lobby. I don't know how many people would agree,or disagree that Sunway Medical Center is one of the best private hospitals in K.L/ Selangor area. Though it may cost a little more, I stand assured that we will always get a good treatment from the hospital staff. 

My baby might born today.......stressed out.....

I had some other issue to write for today's post, however, my wife is experiencing contraction pain. She just entered her 34th week of pregnancy. 2 weeks short of due. But 2 weeks before or after the due date is normal. She came to the clinic with me this morning after breakfast to do her work as usual when the contraction became more frequent and intense. I don't know why, even though this is our third child, but i am feeling anxious.... no, let me rephrase that.... extremely anxious, as if it the first.
The our obstetrician is the renown  Dr Wong Pak Seng, who regularly being interviewed by Star papers on Sundays in a dedicated column on woman's health. Called him up immediately and was advised to go to Apollo Hospital in TTDI for a CTG.(Cardiotocogram). It seemed like her contraction consisted of a combination of weak and strong contraction which isn't very usually seen. (I am sweating and experiencing palpitation as i am writing this... God, I feel so jittery..)
She was advised to be admitted today.
So, fellow readers, we will be heading to Sunway Medical Center. Please pray that everything goes well without any unwanted incident. I thank you.

Signing off,

Chee Hung

Let me introduce you to GOOD MUSIC!

My interest in music goes way back when i was a kid. I remembered the songs in "Top of the Pops" back in the early 80s, then American's Top Ten hosted by Casey Kasem. Not surprisingly, my taste of music evolved with time. My initial appreciation of music based on their melodies and beats changed to understanding the poetic symbolism and lyrical significance. 
My interest to musical groups like Chicago, George Micheal, Micheal Learns to Rock(yucks. they sucks...big time!), Duran Duran, Rick Price, eventually evolved to real musician with artistic gift in writing meaningful and poetic lyrics.... groups like U2(Wow!!!!Hoooot!!!!), Tupac Amaru Shakur( yes, the significance and message conveyed through his lyrics is unmatched by any Rap artist to date!), and Alice in Chains.(shocking? Poetic, a good blend of alternative rock and acoustic element, and the unique voice of the late Layne Staley which was filled with feeling of angst-a distinctive vocal style of the group) 
I guess lifestyle of an individual reflects the personality, and so does the choice of music, hobbies, etc..
Naturally, while in university, there isn't much worries except studies. I would think life begun the day i started work. Dealing with patients, seeing so many death thus far made me think about the significance of our temporary existence. There must be some purpose for our existence. No, let me rephrase that, i was searching for the purpose of life, and that we don't merely exist, but live a life. And so i thought by indulging into spiritual studies, maybe....just maybe i would understand our significance. 
The Holy Bible says simply to love God by choosing to have a relationship with Him through His Son, Jesus Christ. In Hinduism and Buddhism, life is the gateway to Nirvana, to live life in search of our true self, the God within us. Not merely by verbal conviction, but through a living experience, to break free to the circle of life and death, or Karma.
Synonym to putting a lump of sugar into your mouth, then only would experience what "sweetness" taste like, but mere verbal description of sweet wouldn't  make a person understand or experience true "sweetness"..... Confused? I hope not. 
One thing lead to another, THEN my interest in politics developed along the way. I read the papers, checked out websites, bought previously banned books(the Malay Dilemma written by Tun Mahathir back in 1970), the more i read, I realized how unreliable mainstream media is locally. .......(I wish not to comment further on our country's political agenda as i don't want to end up being caught for "expressing my discontentment without regards of the repercussion, as described by Dato Seri **sham**din on the 28 year old blogger who ridiculed the late Sultan of Johor.) 
Naturally, this lead to my interest in world history, war history, current affairs and how it started,eg Israel-Palestine conflict, speech by T*n **hath**r in the last OIC which was regarded by many nation worldwide as anti-semitic. I begun to see the injustice inflicted among mankind, where difference of skin color and the way we call GOD became an excuse  for genocide, war, political killings, assassinations, etc. What has this world come to? Why can't mankind see the beauty and unity behind the diversity? 
I see the passion for oneness, selfless love, forgiveness, human equality, in U2's song. 
Just read the lyric of U2's ONE

Is it getting better?
Or do you feel the same?
Will it make it easier on you now?
You got someone to blame

You say, one love, one life
When it's one need in the night
One love, we get to share it
Leaves you baby if you don't care for it

Did I disappoint you?
Or leave a bad taste in your mouth?
You act like you never had love
And you want me to go without

Well it's too late tonight
To drag the past out into the light
We're one but we're not the same
We get to carry each other, carry each other
One!

Have you come here for forgiveness?
Have you come to raise the dead?
Have you come here to play Jesus?
To the lepers in your head

Did I ask too much? More than a lot
You gave me nothin' now it's all I got
We're one but we're not the same
Well we hurt each other then we do it again

You say love is a temple, love a higher law
Love is a temple, love the higher law
You ask me to enter but then you make me crawl
And I can't be holdin' on to what you got
When all you got is hurt

One love, one blood
One life, you got to do what you should
One life, with each other
Sisters, brothers

I doubt the beauty of the lyrics needs no interpretation. It speaks for itself.

For most of you readers, the word Tupac would probably synonyms with gangsterism, violence, drugs, vulgarism.
Well, do you know Tupac started writing poems during his teenage years as a form of self expression. It's definitely going to take me the whole day to write about him, well brace yourself cause I am going to reveal to you what i find fascinating about him.
The book in the photo is a compilation of all of his poems. I hope you'll enjoy them as much as i did.

Yes, as you can see, I study his poem! Now do you see why I am so into his music? Do you blame me to collect 90% of his albums?

In case if you are wondering why do I have 2 of the same copies, well, that's because I own 2 copies of each album, one set bought locally, where his songs were censored. Totally unsatisfied, I bought the uncensored version from Canada. He he :)
Right, it's been a long write up, and i don't thing i covered even half of what i intended to write. Time is approximately 10.56pm now. Time to tune down and get ready for bed.
Will continue writing tomorrow.
CIAO!

Life is great! Always been, always be!

Woke up at 7am this morning, find it hard to get back to sleep.Perhaps could be due to my new found zest in life. You only live once, so they say. The irony of life is that it take a miraculous 9 months of cell mitosis, cell growth, differentiation, then apoptosis to create life, but in a snap of a finger, unpredictably, death. Whether or not life is worth living depends on what you make out of it. I often question the purpose of life if its filled with sufferings, and no matter how good you live, inevitably you die.
Don't get me wrong. I often ask myself this question when the nature of my job dealt with people's health and life.
While working in the Emergency and Trauma department in Hospital Kuala Lumpur, i see so many death, perhaps too often. I know I am heading for trouble when I find myself thinking, well, too bad, I've tried my best... Next!...
Seeing death became a routine! And dear friends, once that mentality gets into you, snap out of it. How can you appreciate life if you don't treasure it, by not fighting to the end to save a poor unfortunate individual who is clinging to their dear life at the very edge of death?
My brush with the first SARS case in Malaysia really snap me out of ignorance. The sad thing about Malaysia is our "ooh, there's an ongoing pandemic, it happened in Thailand, Singapore, but chill,lahhh... It won't happened to us" kind of attitude.And yes I admit I had that attitude when i was assigned to attend to that 65 year old man who just came back from GuangZhou and developed fever. I was in the room examining him without any protection except glove and a 2 ply face mask. I was sitting right in front of him, looking into his oral cavity which probably had inhaled the breathe that he exhaled.
          When i checked his oxygen saturation which was only 86%(normal healthy individual should be at least 95% and above) I sent him urgently to the "Resuscitation Zone" Facilitated with an oxygen mask(we don't normally intubate patient suspected with pneumonia), he was stabilized, and was admitted to the medical ward.
So, it was just a minor incident (think about it, it was more of a blinder since the nurses and medical attendant did not check his oxygen saturation before sending him to the examination room) and i continue attending to other cases for that day till my shift ends.
The next morning, while having a group discussion with the head of department, we were informed that the patient died in the ward, and Dr Christopher Lee ( our number 1 infectious disease/HIV doctor. He is known to all doctors in Malaysia) labeled him as the first SARS case and casualty in Malaysia. The moment i heard that,my world fell apart, time stood still, images of my love ones flashes before me. I attended to him without proper protection, and i do not want end up like the Singaporean doctor who died after contracting SARS himself while attending to others.
       An order for a home quarantine was passed to me. I held the thermometer they gave me hesitantly, refusing to accept the fact that I was exposed... and was told to call the department 3 times a day to inform of my body temperature.
A million thoughts cramped into my mind, contemplating on my past. I tell you, once you're labeled as "possibly harboring" a potentially deadly incurable form of disease, you begin to regret for not living life to its fullest. Questions like, "how can this happened in the prime of my life","why me?", or even "God, how can this happened to me when I live to serve others?" all became irrelevant. No point thinking about possible death. Its inevitable. I was a vegetarian then, my seventh out of 81/2 years being a vegetarian, influenced by my strong belief in the teaching of Buddhism and Hinduism. I remember a verse i read about the sayings of Lord Buddha," Nothing is permanent and sure in life except death." emanating in my mind. It was a difficult moment as i kept telling myself things would be fine, but the negative thoughts kept on creeping into mind. As each passing day went by without fever, soon the feeling of reassurance and relief sets in.
Since then, i see life in a larger picture, unpredictable as it is, I will live life to its fullest. Good and bad are subjective, depends on how you perceive it.
Ok, bored of reading already? Well, what do you expect? I don't travel much, I don't go to "happening" places, non of the events organized by Nuffnang, just writing my thoughts down as a journal that I may reflect upon in future.
So, smile a lot, Chee Hung!

Most interesting YouTube videos

I mentioned in my previous post that I got this idea for this post. So here you are, some of the most interesting videos I've watched in YouTube.


I actually shed tears watching this video. Life indeed is precious. I often ask myself why are we born, why do we exist if death is inevitable. We lead a life filled with sufferings and difficulties, are we living or merely existing? This particular video kinda answered my question..... to look at life from a different perspective. Its not why we live, its more of who and what we lived for.






What about this video?








at then end
Pa says :
When the first time i see you, my son
i drop tears with joyful
i pray that i'll ever stand by you, take care you
Insurance help me to calm my heart to see you grow up
My son, i love you

These insurance add are really touching and good. Makes me feel good. Please don't tell me these adds aren't tears jerking?


Sad part after watching this video is to realized that compassion is instinctive in this little puppy, and not in human.

Well, I hope you've enjoy watching this videos. Made me feel wonderful to be alive.

i thought my comment would come out first in Tun's blog

All these while, I've been reading Tun Mahathir's blog. His recent speech during a book launch and his blog on 9/11 being "staged" by the US government to use as a reason to invade Afghanistan, and claimed that Saddam possessed WMD(weapon of mass destruction) and hence invaded Iraq really stirred up quite an uproar, and interestingly made me think twice about whether or not Al-Qeada was behind 9/11. 
I left my comment in Tun's blog, and it appeared second...but that's beside the point. To read Tun's interesting write up, click here. 
Watch the video here to know what i mean. 
"Are you crazy? You think they would destroy a landmark structure and killed 3,000 American lives to serve their purpose to invade Iraq and Afghanistan?" 
Well, to answer that, the fact that US and allies, particularly Britain decided to go to war that killed more than 6,000 troops to establish their presence in those country supposedly to hunt down Bin Laden and Saddam for possession of WMD with intend to use against the western world....and found NONE!!!... by itself killed more of its own people. 
Read about it here.
The conspiracy theories about 9/11 was regarded as mythical explanation, but logically speaking, for a country that possesses the most advanced military might in the world,  how was it possible for hijackers to take control of 4 airliners on the same time? How can an airliner enter a restricted air space where Pentagon is without scrambling jet fighters to intercept? (the air space where Pentagon is only allows military jet fighters) Where was the debris of a Boeing 757 that allegedly hit Pentagon? No bodies, no luggage, no plane seats, and no engine from a passenger airliner was ever found in Pentagon! How was that possible? 
My opinion was correct when it was suggested that Pentagon was either hit by a missile of an UCAV.(Unmanned Combat Air Vehicle). 
If you are a terrorist, who supposedly had planned the largest attack on American soil, obviously you would want maximum casualty, right??? Let's say if you were the suicide pilot who flew the plan into Pentagon, how would you cause maximum casualty? Nose dive to the center of the building! (and take out Donald Rumsfeld conveniently) 
But what actually happened was allegedly the airliner hit the side of Pentagon where renovation was taking place, and hence....miraculously...NO CASUALTY!!! :O
I am not sure about whether or not WTC(World Trade Centre,lahhh!!!) collapsed due to the impact by the plane slammed into it. Some physicist and architect(renowned one,lohh) believed the impact was not strong enough to cause the collapse, but instead claimed that the pattern of which the building collapsed was similar to a well planned demolition work!... 
OPEN MIND!!!... OPEN MIND!!!......
Hey, fellow readers, I am not taking sides here. I am just expressing my thoughts. By now, you might think i am anti western.Well, you are WRONG! I am being open minded and thought about 9/11 in depth. 
Why then am i against the idea of boycotting international companies that supports Israel? (Intel, McDonald,Revlon,Johnson & Johnson, just to name a few) well, my heart goes to the fallen,sacrificed,killed,murdered people of Palestine......and Israel. One needs to read the history on how the Israeli-Palestine war(happens to be the longest war in history of mankind, which is still ongoing) begun, and that it is part of Israeli- Arab war. Then develop an opinion after one get their facts right, not just because Palestine is a Muslim country. There are always two sides of a story. I don't believe human are barbaric by nature. 
We need more people like the ones depicted in the commercial below, 
     


By the way, the music for this commercial was composed by renowned Indian composer and musician, AR Rahman.
What do you think?
Hmm.. I think I got an idea for my next post now.

Arrgghhh.... can't accept it!!!!

Well, yesterday was a fun family outing with wife, children, and parents. I am happy that Natalie finally recovered from HFM disease. Though there are multiple dark pigmentation on her skin, but thank God she didn't develop complications or any sequela it. I dreaded complications that results in damage to the valve of the heart or brain. 
We somehow decided to let little Isabelle decide on the venue for dinner. "Daddy, I want to eat pizza!!!"... she said without hesitation. "Pizza, are you sure?" I asked since the last several times we went to pizza hut all she had was the bread stick. "YYYEEESSS!!!!"

So Pizza Hut it is. We ordered 2 regular size pizza (combo for 4), since there were 6 of us. In addition to that, knowing how much my dad loves ice cream, i tempted him with this!

Vanilla ice cream on top of a chocolate cake! It took 4 of us to finish this fella. I realized as i get older, my appetite seemed to decrease, or is it just me being more health conscious these days?!! ;) Could hardly eat anymore after 2 slices of pizza. 

The children played around while  mum and wife were strolling in Popular bookstore.
Actually one of the important item that my parents wanted to get yesterday was a gift for my cousin's wedding this coming February. As usual, its either gold pendant, bracelet, or chain in Chinese tradition. Next stop, TOMEI gold shop. 

As my parents and wife were looking for a gift, I took care of the little ones. 
For those who have children of their own, you would probably understand me. You know how you have little daughters, and you would wish they would always stay the way they are..... little babies, no matter how old they are, they would always be your little babies?
Well, to my horror, my wife and parents decided to get Isabelle's ears pierced. She was so excited about it! I know its selfish of me to discourage her from doing so, but girls will always be girls. Children grow up, but I am sure to all the daddies who have daughter would wish their daughter wouldn't grow up so fast(deep down, how i wish my daughter would stay the way they are......for a long long time!! :) ...) 
But the inevitable happened. My parents and wife agreed to have her ears pierced... only I am against it... 3 against 1... boo hoo hoo!!!

Ouch! First sign of your little girl growing up... she gets her ear pierced.

........sniff..sniff.... and she's happy about it...
I know.. I know.. Some of you guys probably thinks why am I being so conservative.  Don't get me wrong. I love my daughter so much. I saw her being born, grow up, her first day of school, her first concert performance...... and .....her ears being pierced right in front of me!!! Waaaahhhhh!!!!

What??!!!

My jaw dropped to the floor when i read the paper 2 days ago reported on Tun Mahathir's speech during a book launch on the 22nd Jan.
In case if you are wondering what was written, click here.
For the full version of his "thoughts", click here.
Though Tun doesn't hold any government nor political post, but he needs to realize that his words still DOES have an effect on the people of all walks of life in this nation.
For those who knows who Micheal Moore is, and had watched his documentary Fahrenheit 9/11  which happens to be the highest grossing documentary in history that examines the relation between 9/11 and Bush administration, US's invasion on Iraq and Afghanistan, which was obviously highly controversial. Moore's documentary debuted in 2004 Cannes Film Festival which received a 20 minutes standing ovation.( the longest standing ovation in Cannes Film Festival history.)
I've watched Moore's documentary and read several of his books, which in my opinion, worth your time and penny spent. You can check out the trailer and some clips of the documentary in YouTube.
But in my opinion, Tun contributed significantly to our nation's progress. Hey, 8% of annual economic growth is a record unmatched. Kudos to you Tun, but condemning President Obama for his failure in fulfill his promises is......to my humble opinion uncalled and unnecessary. How would it help by stating as such?
            My dad told me once, there are several things you don't discuss openly, which include politics and religion.
Recently 100 members of Viva Palestina walked for 5km to support  the effort to create a free and independent Palestine state, and wearing T shirt calling for a boycott of 4 multinational companies that supports the Zionist state which includes McDonald,Coca-cola, Intel(yeah, right... throw away all your computers. Ironically, they created a website on boycotting these companies that directly links with the Israeli government. Click here to read more. Arsenal football club fans, you're guilty of supporting the atrocities committed by the Israeli military forces against  Palestine. What about the ongoing rocket attacks by the Hamas from the Palestinian side? There are always two sides of a story. I do hope fellow readers read about the history of the ongoing Israeli-Palestinian war. Perhaps THEN they would understand that Israelis don't attack if unprovoked.
Hey, I am not standing on either side, but read the history without religious bias in mind, perhaps you would have a different outlook and opinion on this longest ongoing war. I just don't understand the gesture of calling for a boycott of these companies when there's absolutely NO WAY they are going to throw away their PCs to begin with. Hah! The fact that they created a website calling for a boycott ITSELF is hippo critical of their cause. Think about it, what's inside of their PC?? Huuuuuhhhh!!!????

What's going on?

Lately for the past few weeks i started the day with a gloom. Too many things happening these days. 
First is the "*llah" issue. Though I am not a Muslim, but thought general knowledge, the FACT is the word "*llah" was used in pre-Islam period by the Jewish, Arab Christians, where Christianity was born several centuries prior to the birth of Islam. 
Today, it is still being used by Christians in Arab, Indonesia, and many more. Even a radical Muslim country have no problem with this issue, why would anyone with the right mind brought this issue up, despite being allowed by the Court? Why would the Government still controlled by Barisan national(consist of MCA,MIC,UMNO) challenged the Courts ruling, by insisting the  "word" is exclusively for Muslims only? 
Muslim scholars agree on the use of *llah in their translation of God in the Bible. I am sure that this is a work with a political intend. 
PM 1Malaysia concept is simply a joke since it failed to past the first hurdle. Perhaps despite several efforts made to gain the support of the non Bumi's( the 30% share allotment for Bumiputera was abolished) , but not seeing the feedback as he had hoped for hence the fear of PKR taking over Central Government, a desperate attempt to maintain in power and control, they (this is my own hypothesis only) resort to evoke a racial and religious sentiment with this A%%ah issue. 
Ever wonder even after 10 churches being attacked, police have not arrested a single person. Logically, when a sensitive issue as such was at its infancy, the government should be on high alert considering the high potential (exponentially I might add) of a racial riot, hence a repeat of another May 13 incidence. 
I am saddened by the inadequacy and incompetence in decision making and implementing policies that is always benefit "you know who",I feel sad for my children.
Then, a few days later, the catastrophic earthquake that hit Haiti causing death in thousands. 
The latest being the most heart wrenching news on the deaths of 5 students and a teacher while training for their coming dragon boat race.
Its not only imagining the dead body, but the last few seconds or minutes that happened. What was on their mind as they struggle for air. You hold on to your breathe until you can hold no more. 
Non of them new that day would be their last.  
Though they are strangers to me, but i could feel the sufferings, agony, hopelessness, sadness to the brink of insanity. I was teary while watching the news about the capsized
boat, and the reaction of the parents  hurts me so much. I understand  how they feel as i have children too. If it was I, I sincerely don't know how to react.

I would like to request fellow bloggers to offer a prayer for the fallen victims, may they rest in peace in a far better place.

Let us all offer our prayers to victims and their family for strength, and courage during this turmoil.

Can't help feeling helpless....

2 days ago, my little 1 1/2 year old vomited followed by a fever. By night she developed multiple small reddish spots on the foot and hand. My heart sank. Its either chicken pox or HFM disease(hand,foot, and mouth disease) But the fact that she completed her chicken pox vaccination and based on the distribution of the lesion, I feared it might be the latter, which was confirmed by the Pediatrician.
However, it was such a soothing effect to see her elder sister Isabelle trying to comfort her sick sister. I came to work as usual but with a little extra zest as I told Isabelle that we'll bring her to Pizza Hut tomorrow. 
By afternoon, I received a call from my wife that Isabelle developed fever. The first thought that popped in my head was "God, help!" I went back home immediately and checked her temperature. 39.8 degree Celsius. My mood took a 180 degree change, my thoughts became clouded, she got HFM too. I felt so helpless as I know small percentage of patients with this disease would develop complications, involving the brain, heart, and lung... with long term consequences. 
I knelt beside Isabelle's bed and watched her sleep. Gentle stroking her head. I prayed to God at that moment to be with her. Even when i attend to my patients who had the same problem, I am often worried and often call their parents up to check up on their progress. 
Now it happened on my own children. Isabelle who is always smiling and cracking up silly jokes is now sick. As I sponged her body to lower the temperature, she opened up her eyes and looked at me,"Daddy, I am feeling cold.."  I told her to drink plenty of water and get well soon, gave her a gentle kiss and told her that i would like to accompany her sleeping tonight. Despite the body ache, chills, and feeling weak, she told me its ok for her to sleep by herself. 
My strong little girl.....
 

Am I blogging for others or for myself?

Its nearly 2 years since i started blogging and i have not achieved the status of a "Celebrity Blogger"No, i don't compare myself to other celebrity bloggers who are much younger and blogged for a far shorter period of time to be well known in the blogsphere. In fact, i realized bloggers who writes about their grandiose alcohol sponsored parties, their exotic holidays where only a handful of us can afford, to summarize  it all , they possess a common train, they love to show the world that they've been there,  and done that. 
Commoners like me who write from my heart, at times with overwhelming emotions, about our daily life, the amusing first times that everything my little toddler does, social issues, generally more matured stuff, tend to have a very poor hits. Huh, i've just earned about RM67 after 2 years of blogging. Sad. 
But I must always remember the reason why I begin blogging wasn't to meet friends, to earn $, or to be known? I blog to express my inner feelings. I know there are bloggers who receives 70-100 comments on a daily basis. I've never received 50 comments in 2 years. 
I came to term with myself, well, I blog as diary, my feeling, a place where i pour my heart out. It doesn't matter i don't get any reader. You can almost predict who is going to be the top 10 innit bloggers everyday. It revolves around a few bloggers. 
Well, surprisingly once in a while I do get genuine compliments. 2 years of blogging, at last someone who appreciate my write ups commented,"Your contents are gems". That really touched me. And I am very sure this gentleman constantly search for a good read. I felt very appreciated. Your compliments were golden,Mr Ng.

Life as we view it

As I watched the news yesterday reporting on the earthquake that hit  Haiti yesterday which was recorded at 7.0 to the Richter scale( the worst earthquake was recorded at 9.0 in 1960 in Chile). Thousands dead, with an estimated 500,000 lives gone.My eyes were glued to the TV watching the news on the incidence. I prayed hard for relief team to arrive as soon as possible, as their administrative building,palace,hospitals, schools, churches , government buildings had collapsed. The capital's Roman Catholic Archbishop was killed, the head of U.N peace keeper team has been missing, with prisons collapsed, hundreds of prisoners escaped and worst of all, as it happened to all post earthquake, looting became rampant. Thousand of lives gone, and millions suffered from lost of properties, which i believe took them an effort of a lifetime to acquired were gone from nature's fury and human action. 
The first thing in the morning upon reaching the clinic, i check for updates on the Haitian earthquake. 
All that i saw was these:-

 

My heart sank looking at the reports and these pictures. Imagine we are the ones who are in the pictures. Instead of them. I just closed my eyes and prayed. The Republic of Haiti was the first country to gained post colonial independence in Latin America and also the only country to have gained it through slave rebellion. It is also one of the 2 countries that designated French as their National language.The other being Canada. 

I was emotionally moved when the Americans where the first to arrive as part of the relief team to help the devastated country. Doctors Without Borders (/Médecins Sans Frontières) 

arrived to attend to the traumatized and survivors. I always have the utmost respect for volunteer doctors who dedicate their time and being away from family to provide their service to devastated countries whether due to man made or natural catastrophe. Seeing them on TV reminded me of the time when i applied to join DWB(doctors without borders) and remember how excited I  was just to inquire on the requirements. I fulfill all the requirements, but the nearest office for interview prior to joining is located in Hong Kong. 

As I ponder on such incident, I begin to .....again, question the very purpose of our existence. Man are either believer of a higher divine force, the creator, God, or another group of free thinkers, that there is a scientific explanation for all the wonders of the world, an atheist. Because based on logic,

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son,^[a] that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."-- John 3:16 (New International Version)
..... but then it is also stated that

 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,"  declares the LORD.

                                                                                                      -- Isaiah 55:8
I am not questioning the contents of the Bible, hey, I read the Bible, and know quite a number of verses by heart,ok. 
Perhaps we shouldn't think much about why it happened, just accept it.... the question is, can we?
With such calamities that befalls mankind, where the concept of "We reap what we sow", or "cause and effect" which was and is still regarded as a golden rule in life by majority of people, goes out the window, I don't blame the ideology of an atheist. You'll be surprised to know throughout history of mankind, there are hundreds of historical, celebrities, philosophers, authors, politicians,etc... who are atheist. 
Check them out here. 
I am NOT  questioning the existence of God,nor am i trying to create some sort of hype,  but seriously, question our self. I sincerely hope that fellow Christians who read this post would have this impression on why am I always quoting verses from the Holy Bible, whether am i trying to prove that book is fake? NO! I read the Bible and find a lot of my problems and prayers answered by the living book. 
I just question the purpose of our existence. That's all. But yes, someone can tell me that mother earth does not flourish on bright sunshine alone, but along with thunderstorms and rain, or examples like  a diamond gets its value after being subjected to million of years of heat and pressure.Well, i can go on and on with these "inspirational quotes" but when calamities hit, all that goes right out the window. 
To be totally honest, I had a near death experience nearly 2 years ago, when i suddenly developed a convulsion that lasted 4-5 minutes, in which I stopped breathing as my respiratory muscles went into spasm. I turned blue. I was sent to the resuscitation unit in University Hospital, and when i gained consciousness, there were multiple bruises all over my face, broken tooth, and the most sharp tearing pain over my right shoulder, then only i realized i feel down the hospital bed with an outstretched arm  and dislocated my shoulder. 
I can't remember the doctors pushing me down to the resuscitation unit, nor do i remember being coded red. I don't remember seeing light at the end of the tunnel, nor standing in front of a gate, doesn't matter if its the Pearly Gate or the Gate of Hell. Non of those. All that i could remember when i gain consciousness was seeing my mother and wife crying, and my little daughter who was not even 4 who was too young to know what went on then staring at me asking me if i am feeling alright. 
You pray everyday for health, happiness, and family salvation, and i am sure those Haitians prayed daily during their lifetime. Despite that, everything gone in minutes. Now think about it, this little irony about life.

Life is a test

Reopening the clinic after 3 months does have its effect. Since last month the number of patient dropped by 75%. I found myself sitting in the clinic for hours without any patients walking in is rather depressing. Watching the clock telling me its almost time to close up can often be teary, frustrating, and psychologically damaging. 
When time as such happens, i will drive back home to spent time with little Isabelle and Natalie. Seeing how they play so happily as if the concept of hardship and worries doesn't exist works magic to me. I often lose myself in this midst of depression, disappointment, and frustration. And God is kind enough to send me two lovely Angels to show me the way back to strength and happiness. 
I remembered 2 days ago, I had a similar depressing day, until i read a mail sent by my lovely wife.

Charles Schultz's Philosophy

The following is the philosophy of Charles Schultz, the creator of the
"Peanuts" comic strip.
You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just read the e-mail
straight through, and you'll get the point.

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America.

4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.

5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and
actress.

6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.



How did you do?

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no
second-rate achievers.
They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish.
Achievements are forgotten.
Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners .



Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.

2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.

3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.

4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.

5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with .



Easier?

The lesson:

The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most
credentials, the most money,
or the most awards. They are the ones that care .



Pass this on to those people who have made a difference in your life.

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today.

It's already tomorrow in  Australia " (Charles Schultz)

Then i remembered a post I wrote quite a long time ago in this blog about life. 

http://www.hippocrates1976.com/2008/09/what-is-life.html

I read those post again and again,and each time i could actually feel the problems slowly ease away leaving me more relaxed. After a few times, I feel rejuvenated. I welcome challenge! 
Come to think about it, our life would definitely be mundane and predictably boring if everything goes smooth sailing. Facing hardship and overcoming them is what makes me feel alive!! 
Hmmm..... The previous post about leaving life freely and experience the thrill of life by parachuting, bungee jumping, cliff diving,etc.. those aren't anything close to our everyday problems. 
Ever wonder why each students who attended the seminar by world re known Anthony Robbins would be asked to walk on hot burning charcoal for a certain distance? (also known as firewalking practiced by the Hindus on Thaipusam). Each student who successfully completed the task are deemed graduate. Not as superman where their skin can tolerate thousands of degree Fahrenheit, but more...much more than that. They have acquired the skill of controlling their mind over fear, which is not an easy thing to do. They believe they can, and hence they can.  The firewalking is merely symbolic. 
Once we overcome the fear, uncertainties, questions, doubts in our mind, once we empty our head from the dirt of negativity that has been occupying it for too long, only then can we fill them up with positive thoughts, and that's when progress and improvements begins. 
I realized I was exhausted, down, low spirited, held my head so low that i could see what's ahead of me. Why did i let these negative thoughts took control of myself the entire morning? 
Friends, I would like to share on of my all time favorite singer whom i started listening to his song more than 10 years ago, and still enjoy listening to him, the late Mr Nat King Cole.

SMILE

Smile though your heart is aching

Smile even though it's breaking

When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by

If you smile through your fear and sorrow

Smile and maybe tomorrow

You'll see the sun come shining through for you

Light up your face with gladness

Hide every trace of sadness

Although a tear may be ever so near

That's the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what's the use of crying?

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile

That's the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what's the use of crying?

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile

Radical followers should listen and learn something about this

While i was in India, I was introduced to this group who call them self Colonial Cousin, which is made up of 2 singer, Hariharan, who is a Hindu and an Indian playback singer in Hindi, Tamil, Malayalam, Kannada, Marathi and Telugu movies, an established ghazal singer, and one of the pioneers of Indian fusion music, and Leslie Lewis is a singer,songwriter, guitarist, and most important, a Christian. 

  Hariharan  

Together they are.....   

A beautiful fusion of Indian and Western music with songs depicting the Onenes of God, despite being called in various name. 

I love their album for the message they convey, which revolves on universal love, the common God, peace, selflessness, true love that transcends religious and racial barrriers.

Listen to their songs and appreciate the lyrics, then you'll realized they are one of a kind.

 

Lyrics of the song Krishna

CHORUS: Krishna Ni Bhe Gha-Ni, Baroo !

Krishna Ni Bhe Gha-Ni, Baroo !

Darkness coming around,
And every body fight with the brother
Every body wants control,
Don't hesitate to kill one-another

So come back as Jesus
Come back and save the world
Bless all the future of every boy and girl
Come back as Rama,
Forgive us for what we've done
Come back as Allah,
Come back as anyone

CHORUS: .......

Religion is the reason,
The world is breaking up into pieces
Colour of the people,
Keeps us locked in hate please release us

So Come down and help us,
Save all the little ones
They need a teacher,
And you are the only one
We can't rely on,
To build a better world
A world that's for children, 
A world that's for everyone

CHORUS:.....

(Interlude)

Time is healer, and time moves on
Time don't wait for any one
So, Tell me you'll be back
But that will take some time

I waiting ////...... (with interlude)
I'm waiting, yeah yeah......

Come back as Jesus
Come back and save the world
We need a teacher,
and You are the only one
Come back as Rama
Forgive us for what we've done
Come back as Allah
Come back for every one.......

(Interlude)
Govinda Guruhari Gopala hu.....//////////// (Fade)

Sony DSLR basic training 10.1.2010

 (Click on the photos for full size)

Its been more than a year since i bought my Sony DSLR. My initial purpose was to take before and after photos of patients for any cosmetic procedures. However, i was bitten by the shutterbug and started using it leisurely.It was pretty much a trial and error thingy as i didn't get to attend the free Sony Alpha DSLR course for new owners. Thanks to Kiumo, Mr Sharma, Gabriel Lai, and Ah Mike, that i learned so much from.
At last, i got to attend the course yesterday held at Grand Continental Hotel, Kuala Lumpur.

My heart was pounding with excitement for this course. I called up Sony centre twice to confirm my attendance. I arrived at the lobby and saw about 3-4 people carrying DSLR camera. I waited with them for about 1/2 hour before being told to assemble on the 10th floor at the seminar room. 

There were a total of  about 50+ participants. I notice some with their "cangging" super telephoto lens.

t

The instructor was Head of Product Communications and Training in Sony, Malaysia. 

 

b

He took us through the basics workings of a DSLR, and the fundamentals of taking photos with DSLR. Nothing complicated, nothing that i haven't know already after more than a year of using DSLR by self taught through fellow bloggers, various magazines, websites, and hundreds if not not thousands of trials and errors. 

He taught us how to focus, the basics of aperture, and shutter speed. We did some experiments on depth of field by taking photos of our belongings and place them at different distance from the camera. 

After about 3 hours of lecturing, its practical time. Ah,hah! That's what everyone was waiting for. There were three models for us to shoot, but i managed to photograph two of them. Its rather difficult to photograph them as there are so many of us and the models hard a hard time smiling at individual cameras!

See what i mean. Oh, no, this is only 1/2 the crowd.

Everyone was told to take their time to photograph the models, I took like 15 minutes. Instead of taking photos of the models, I have to take this pic. Hihihi...

Notice the guy wearing white shirt on the right side of the photo bending all the way down trying to photograph the model clad is a red dress? Hmm.... that's what i call extreme photography. 

Anyway these are the photos i took. 

 

 

After the photo shoot, we were supposed print out our pick one among the shots taken to be printed at 8R size. Obviously all of us would chose the best shots among many. As I scroll through the photos in my camera, I stumbled one which I think is a real beauty. Managed to capture the model while she was unaware that she's being photograph. I saw the emotions and can relate to the subject that  I took. To me, it was a real beauty, timeless, spontaneous photo taken in black and white. 

 

 A portrait of Isabelle. 
All the photos were printed from a ultra high end Noritsu printer which cost RM130,000 each. 

f

Soon, every came back and had their shots printed. 

r

I went back to my seat, and just look at the black and white photo of Isabelle, It brought me back to the time when i took the photo in the room. She was unhappy about something, folded her arms and sulk. Tears were forming in her eyes. I guess by definition 

a photo that tells stories by itself just by looking at it, capturing the raw emotion spontaneously, and manage to feel the subject that you took is a good photo... well, I guess it a good  photo then. 

I truly enjoyed the course. But the lesson is just the beginning. I half a long way to go. In the mean time, I'll continue to learn from the master, and save up money to either get a better lens or camera.